And now, I can’t work either. Oh, I know I was only working with one student a day, but I was able to do on little thing every day. One thing.
Not now. I don’t feel well enough to sit upright for an hour. I’m waiting for my angiogram on Thursday and I’m reduced to watching my guys take care of things around me while I lie in one lounging chair or another. They’re like hummingbirds, Mike and Nick, moving faster than I can comprehend. Right now I’m out on the deck looking at the way the Western red cedar waves its branches in a slight breeze and thinking that my phone shouldn’t be so heavy. My tree is beautiful and slow but I can almost always see its branches wave. There’s a soothing sound it makes too.
Mike’s grilling steaks and baking potatoes. They smell perfect right now, but I don’t feel all that hungry.
I feel the way I used to feel after a hundred yard dash, that putting food on it would be a mistake until I caught my breath. Don’t worry. I’m not getting thin or anything. I’m eating enough, especially with steak and potatoes on the menu.
I wonder if being sick is for slowing time and feeling the weight of small things. I wonder if I wasn’t intended to watch the breeze in the branches and to listen to its soughing song.
Pray for me, if you will.
Thank you for listening, jules